Monday, September 29, 2008

Christmas is not that far off

You see, kids, when a Lego Man and a Lego woman love each other very much...

Oh, who am I kidding.

This looks like a back ally, Jaeger-induced sorority romp if I ever saw one, which I have — oddly enough. Hays, Kansas - 2005 at the Pheasant Run. Fruit Compote was involved. I will never look at breakfast foods the safe way again.

Coming to a theater near you

In a world where the the fight is no longer with a beast, but rather a City ...

One man will prepare for the Adventure of a lifetime that will take him to the edge of hell for a staring contest with Jesus himself.

"You don't know what you doing. This is crazy. You'll get yourself killed." — Mom

This fall, a band lovable misfits will follow him to conquer the world and even discover a little something about themselves...

"No matter what happens here, man, I want you to know I love you." — Leo

On Tuesday, be the first in line as the shit hits the fan and the Wednesday Weekly once again proves that the real Adventures are always just ahead.

"Now if only we could get some voice talent to do this preview..." - Mike

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Murder Checkers!

Folks, I am not a big Television person. I'm more of a get the DVD or download it from the interwebs when it comes to my obscure likes.

But the Office is the rare exception.

Get pumped.

Monday, September 22, 2008

Who needs edukatshun?

Lord knows the school districts around here don't exactly provide a modern education. Still, one of my favorite blogs out there is offering a a great deal (and chance at shameless self promotion).

Mental Floss, in its on-going mission to de-retardify the nation, is offering $50,000 in scholarship money to students heading college. Now, I know we have a lot of teacher-type readers to this little dumping ground of drivle ... so, it's nice to know that we can give back in our own little way (and shamelessley promote the hell out of this site).

Granted, the WW has been more of a promoter of bad decisions and more booze — but isn't that what college is really all about. So, get out there, Seniors, and make us proud with those college decisions... and don't forget to post it all to Facebook.

Rules and forms for the scholarship can be found here.

Saturday, September 20, 2008

Homemade Politics

With only 46 day until the presidential election, I know we have gone a bit overboard with the political ads and jib-jab here at the WW.

But when this homemade ad came rolling across the WW Natl. Desk, we knew we had to...nay, the force told us we had to share the glory.

The man supports Athletics AND Arts ... Finally, Jocks and Whiny Hipsters can join together under the stewardship of this Lightsaber-wielding politician. Knight used this ad in his 2007 bid for the county school board. At some point VH1 even aired the commercial (but who watches VH1, srsly) and turned him into a bit of a celebrity.

But it seems from his blog that things have not as well as his commercial would indicate.

Well, from the Temple of Gonzo and the WW, we hope to see more out this southern Jedi.

Friday, September 19, 2008

ARG! Fake Holidays Shiver me Timbers!

Here we are celebrating Natl. Talk Like A Pirate Day.

My skull and cross bones flag flew at half mast today to honor those pirates that have gone before me and died for ...well, the right to loot and plunder... or something like that.

Yay, America!

Usually I would try to shy away from holiday propagated by Dave Barry, but since this is one of those few holidays that allows, arg!, encourages you to drink like a Pirate, then I think it is completely acceptable.

(Other acceptable binge drinking holidays include: New Years, Valentines Day, St. Patrick's Day, Wednesday, The Fourth of July, Memorial Day, Labor Day, Thanksgiving, Christmas, Cinco De Mayo, President's Day, Columbus Day, Black History Month, Women's History Month, Christmas in July, International Pi day, International Pie day, Administrative Assistant Day, etc.)

But wait there is more. Talk like a Pirate Day is also one of those few days where you can loudly shout at every woman by calling her a Bow-legged Wench and not fear some class action law suit — again.

There was a time when some friends took the Pirate theme fairly seriously...of course there may have been alcohol, drugs, goats and leisure suits involved, but we assigned each other Pirate Names none the less.

To this day I still insist that aboard my Pirate Ship I am only to be referred to as Jolly Green Giant. It made sense back then — again, alcohol drugs, goats and leisure suits, blah blah blah.

Avast, ye matey! To hearken and honor this sacred day of the Seven Seas, I offer you Concert pianist Wibi Soerjadi playing a Pirate jig — hook hand and all.


Monday, September 15, 2008

The gloves have come off...

... and it seems the Obama camp is now going nuclear (New-clear, Ms. Palin).

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Stand up, Chuck!

Oh sweet merciful god.

I told you. I said it here first. If the Democrats are going to lose, it's going to be because of Joe "Luddite" Biden.

While speaking at a Columbia rally, Biden wanted to recognize State Sen Chuck Graham. Graham has been a huge Democrat advocate for the University, schools, health care etc and has had quite an impressive a career in the Jefferson City.

So, Biden, wanting to give the prominent democrat his spotlight, asked Chuck to stand up and wave to the crowd.

Chuck, by the way, is in a wheelchair.

Oh, Raptor Jesus, this is embarrassing...

Back in the day I used to cover the Mo. General Assembly when Chuck was state rep for Columbia. During one event in his office, Chuck was using his fire-brand style of speech to lambaste the Governor for cutting funds to something.

From the event: "Nothing is going to stop me from restoring funds to the budget," he said.

"Except for maybe a flight of stairs," one young reporter quipped

"Hey, Fuck you!"

I knew then politics was never going to be my strong suit.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

I am Spartacus

How did I miss this?

Kansas City is getting its ownBasketball team. Well ... an ABA Team: The Kansas City Spartans.

The fledgling league is expected to have a press conference at Ilus David park downtown on Sept. 17 to announce open try-outs. The league claims they have been planning this new team since June, but have been slow to get press out.

Even without a roster, the team's Web site claims they will begin playing in December ... DECEMBER!

Still, there is no word on where this team will be playing, but I will bet the city will not let them use the still-empty Sprint Arena.

Because the NHL sucks and the NBA is worthless, I don't expect either of those leagues will be filling the mega-empty arena any time soon.

More importantly, they are also looking for talent to come up with the team anthem that will presumably be sung at every event to a swelling throng of the player's families and friends — assuming even they show up.

I'm not saying the ABA is a bad thing, but let's take a serious look at the most recent trend that sports has taken in this city.

Royals - Losers
Cheifs - Soon-to-be -Losers
Brigade: Seasonal Disasters
Wizards: Soccer is not a real sport...
Blades: Who?

This could get interesting.

I wish them the best of luck.

Tuesday, September 09, 2008

Jumping the Mother-fucking shark.

Yep. When I say I will post anything to do with Lego, I mean it. The Simpsons intro done via Lego and shitty stop-motion animation.

You can thank me later.

Sean Tevis is my hero.

Check out the video and some of the great photos from the Old Settler's Parade (yes, the apostrophe goes there) where we marched for Sean Tevis. Up as the ass-crack of dawn and battling a hangover, we marched in the drizzle for Tevis and a chance at becoming the next YouTube micro-celebrity.

Tevis is battling the incumbent Old, Arlen Siegfreid, for the Kansas State House out of Olathe.

Click for more photos and Sean's Web site.

Tevis says 'HELLO' to the masses of Olathe.
From the Tevis campaign Web site

Thursday, September 04, 2008

Old Missouri, fair Missouri...

My dear old Varsity.

I'm not usually one to kick my old Alma Mater, especially when I am surrounded by all these KU doofers.

Still, I could not ignore the irony when this marketing packet made its way to my office. MU is celebrating all things journalism with a week-long booze-fest and gathering of journalists in Columbia to celebrate the J-school's 100th Birthday.

But throwing a birthday party in the hallowed halls of a dying industry is like recognizing the birthday of your dead cat. Sure, cake and streamers are fun, but its not bringing Twinkle back to life.

Adding the a little salt to the "Your industry is dying" wound, the J-school announced several weeks ago (after more than a year of planning this J-bration) that they might have to shut down The Missourian — the daily paper run by the J-school.

Mizzou saw the writing on the wall to close the paper opting to go online instead, but it seems its marketing department did not. The media packet advertising for the event included pages of chest thumping for the newspaper declaring it one of the best labs for journalism and an award-winning institution.

It was amazing that Columbia (barely) kept two city newspapers alive for that long. This does not even begin to touch the myriad student-run, Greek influenced or just retarded rags that float through that town.

When I hit this party, I'll have to make sure to pour one out for my homies at The Mo'ian.

Tuesday, September 02, 2008

In a world...

This is a sad day. Others, though, they see it as my chance to break into the "menacing, post-apocalyptic" voice over market.

Don "The scary voice" LaFontaine died Monday at 68.

From the news: The Minnesota-born LaFontaine reportedly voiced over 5,000 trailers and almost 350,000 commercials. He's responsible for the ubiquitous trailer-opening phrase "In a world..."

"In a world where out movie trailers are boring and suck..."

Via The Carter.